best quote of thanksgiving

"Stop torching me, Uncle Jason!" (she meant "torturing" -- he was tickling her and trying to scare her.)

First runner up, said in jealousy as I held our new nephew: "Baby Ben wants to go back to his mama. Time for him to go."

She did say she liked him and that he was very cute, though. So there is hope.

picky picky

We were packing for Thanksgiving. I showed her a shirt and asked if she wanted to bring it.

C: No, mama. Not that shirt. It's too purple. And squiggly. [squiggly hand gestures here]
M: It's too "squiggly"???
C: Yes, the lines go 'round and up and 'round. It's too squiggly.
M: Oh, I see. So sorry to suggest it, your highness.
C: It's ok. You just made a bad choice.

diagnosis: still crazy

Dr. Caroline stopped by with her plastic stethoscope. Her bedside manner was gentle and kind. "Don't worry, sweetie. It will be ok. You are fine." Then she held the end of the stethoscope to my head and listened for a moment. "You're just kind of crazy."

retort

Today she was a total tornado. Buzzing around the house, dancing, singing, jumping, and generally going nutso. I asked (rhetorically), "My goodness, are you hyper today?"

She replied, "No. I'm just cute."

xoxox

"I love my pretty hearts. I love love."

little surgeon

Patty got spayed earlier this week, so we have been tending to her incision and checking on it. Caroline is very interested in this.

C: What's that line?
M: It's where the doctors had to cut Patty's skin so they could get to her organs.
C: They cut her?
M: Yep.
C: Inneresting.
M: It's kinda neat.
C: Yeah. [pause] I'll be right back. Let me find my smaller scissors*.


* "Smaller scissors" is what she calls her safety scissors. She knows big scissors = big people.

storyteller

"There is a grandpa dog and a bird. The dog is nerbous [nervous]. He is nerbous because he is doing his best. Trying his best. And he has some flowers. And one day I catched them. I catched them with the scariest bag. It was a blue bag. And I was on a pony horse. It was 'sterious [mysterious]."

daddy has a name

She has figured out that Daddy has a name aside from "Daddy." Today she was playing in something she shouldn't have and I asked if she made a mess.

She said, "Let me ask Chuck."

She ran to the stairs and said, "Chuck, I need a little help!"

He called down that he doesn't answer to Chuck.

She yelled up the stairs, "Chuck, I need your help!"

He repeated that his name to her is Daddy, and that he wouldn't answer to Chuck.

"Daddy, I need your help..." And as soon as he stood up to come downstairs, she finished her sentence with, "Chuck." And grinned.

character band-aids

Caroline has taken to wearing band-aids as though they are stickers. She usually has one on the top of each hand, and sometimes has a third on her knee. Each time one comes off, she negotiates for a new one. "Can I have a Hello Kitty band-aid?" "Can I have just one more Dora band-aid?" And so on. She has a very clear idea of which band-aid design she wants.

The other day, she asked Chuck if he wanted a band-aid. When he said no, he didn't need one, she tried to tempt him with, "Daddy, you can have a Barack Obama band-aid!"

early morning

She woke up at 5:15am and started asking about her guitar.

"Daddy, where's my guitar?"

He told her it was over there.

"Daddy, where's your guitar?"

He told her it was over there.

"Do you want to play guitars with me?"

He told her it was too early.

"You're right, Daddy. It's too noisy for rock 'n roll this early."

honesty is refreshing

I tossed her Backyardigan toys into a chair, and she got very upset. She turned the TV off and told me I was in time out. Apparently I "scared" them and that is "not very nice."

Then she told her dad that I was in big trouble. When she finally agreed to let me out of time out, Chuck told her to ask me if I knew why I was in time out.

"Mama, do you know why you were in time out?"

"Because you're a dictator."

"Yep!" Pause. "I sure am a dictator."

magic indeed

Caroline went upstairs to the play room, like she often does. After a little while, I heard the speakerphone kick on and the phone ringing. An automated voice picked up and started talking. I ran as fast as I could to get there to hang up and lecture her about not touching the phone. Then I saw it. The Sharpie Incident. She had taken a blue sharpie (that I'd stupidly left out), and scrawled from one edge of the desk to the other. Writing on the phone. Writing on the desk top (all over it). Writing on a glass. Writing on the computer's mouse. Writing on the bag of pretzels left on the desk. Writing on the handle of a spoon. Writing on two of her favorite toys. Writing on every blessed thing there. And a lot of writing. Blue sharpie writing.

I said, "CAROLINE, WHAT DID YOU DO?!"

"I did some writing, Mama. But it's ok, it's just pretend."

P.S. It all came off from the most important objects, thanks to Mr. Clean and his Magic Eraser. Two of her toys are kind of stained with blue, but it's just pretend.

her girls

She left 2 of her stuffed toys in her carseat while she was at preschool. When I picked her up, she flung open the door and grabbed them and hugged them.

"My girls are here. Aren't they just lovely?"

unsolicited

During her bath, she looked up to her dad between splashfests and announced:

"Mama is crazy!"

Like it was a secret she had to get off her chest. Let's be real, kid. It's not a secret to anyone.

groggy

In the wee hours, as she first woke up.

C: Dada, can you get my blankie?
D: Sure, can you say 'please'?
C: Okay.
D: But can you say 'please' right now?
C: Ooohkaaay.
D: No, dear, can you say 'Can you get my blankie, please?'
C: [deadpan] Dada, it's far too early.

future marine biology fantasy writer

She saw a photo of the narwhal, which looks like this:


"Look Mama, it's a whale-icorn!"

she's onto me

She was frustrated while trying to line up her toys. They kept falling over and she whined and stomped. I started to sing "Keep trying, keep trying, don't give up..." And she said, "No thank you, Mama. No singing!"

I asked her why I couldn't sing.

She whined, "Because you'll make me smile."

back off

She was wearing tights on her head (and no other clothing at all), in order to look like a rabbit. I approached her with a shirt while trying to get her ready for preschool. I promised I would put it on over her bunny ears, so as not to undo her fun. Still, she would not cooperate.

While waving her arms, "No. Mama, no thank you! I need some space. I just need a little space."

And then she stormed out of the room, sat on a chair in her bedroom, and glowered at me (with arms huffily crossed) when I looked in.

"I SAID I NEED SPACE!"

a question

"Are cats ticklish?"