Bedtime stall action, take 412.
Caroline: [from the hall] Mama, can I talk to you?
Mama: Caroline, you need to be in bed. What's the problem?
Caroline: I think I really have a stomach ache. A bad one.
Mama: What makes you think you have a stomach ache?
Caroline: [very gravely] Well, it's what they call "gas."*
*with finger quotes